This article is a transcript of the Adventure Time episode "Ghost Fly" from season 6, which aired on October 28, 2014.

Tree Fort
This transcript is complete.


[A thunderstorm rages outside the Tree Fort. Inside, BMO is practicing karate.]
BMO: Kya! Kya! [reading karate magazine] Hmm.
[The magazine reads, "How to stop a man's heart with karate: 1. 'Focus chi' and 2. 'Stop a man's heart'" with diagrams depicting each action.]
BMO: Ohhh, that's pretty good. Kya! [punches a hole in the punchbag pillow]
Jake: [covers ears] BMO... keep it down!
BMO: But you said 8:00 to 10:00 is my time to do karate. It's my karate time!
Jake: I know, but I got a headache, and I'm in a funky mood.
Finn: What's wrong, dude?
Jake: I don't know. I think I got restless leg syndrome.
Finn: Is that from getting chubby?
Jake: What? No, man, it's just restless leg.
Finn: Oop! My bad.
Jake: What are you reading?
Finn: This old copy of Adventure Boy magazine—the only magazine for boy adventurers. This kid Rusty is getting chased down the river by three grown otters. This magazine rules! But I'm saving the end for tomorrow. [closes magazine]
Jake: Cool.
Finn: Well, I hope your leg feels better. I'm turning in. I'll see you up there.
Jake: [blows raspberry]
BMO: [sing-song] Jake...
Jake: No, BMO.
BMO: KYA! [punches pillow]
Jake: [screams] No, BMO! No more! [walking into kitchen] Maybe some soup will take the edge off.
[Jake starts preparing a pot of soup. A fly lands on the edge and slurps it.]
Jake: Ew! Gross! Nasty! [smacks it with a flyswatter] Hyah!
[The fly flails its legs a little, then stops moving.]
Jake: I'm sorry you were born a fly and I had to kill you, you disgusting, disgusting creature.
BMO: Kya! Kya! Kya!
[Outside, the rain has stopped. Jake climbs upstairs and into his bed.]
Jake: [yawns, smacks lips]
[Suddenly, some rattling and knocking sounds are heard coming from downstairs.]
Jake: [sits up] Finn, was that you?
Finn: [snores]
Jake: [lies back down] Probably just BMO or something.
[The record downstairs is heard playing jazz.]
Jake: That's weird. BMO doesn't like 30's jazz. [climbs downstairs] Yeesh. Creepy. [takes the needle off the record]
[On a shelf above Jake, a toy monkey starts clacking its cymbals together repeatedly.]
Jake: [gasps] [fearfully] I didn't know we had one of those.
Voice: [spookily] Oooooo...
Jake: [panting] Hey, hey. Hey, who?
[A ghost fly appears and slowly moves toward Jake.]
Jake: Aah!
Ghost Fly: Ooooooo...
Jake: Hey! I killed you!
[The fly swoops at Jake and buzzes around his head.]
Jake: Aah! [tries waving it away, then runs] Aah! Ghost fly touching me! [climbs upstairs] Finn! Finn!
[The fly continues buzzing around Jake.]
Finn: [jerks awake] Aah!
Jake: Ghost fly, man! Aah! Aah!
Finn: Okay.
Jake: Come on, man. Let's get out of the house. It's a ghost fly!
Finn: So what?
Jake: No, man, ghost flies are filthy! They carry diseases, such as tuberculosis, polio, dysentery. They leave those little fly doodies on your soul.
[The ghost fly swoops in and out of Jake's torso.]
Jake: Aah!
[The ghost fly conjures a scythe out of nowhere and chases after Finn and Jake. They dodge its attack and jump downstairs.]
BMO: Finn, Jake! What's wrong?!
Finn & Jake: Ghost fly!
BMO: [screams]
[The three run out of the tree fort. They stop after a few seconds.]
Jake: [sighs] Thank goodness we lost him. He's gone.
[Suddenly, the ghost fly appears beside him.]
Ghost Fly: Whoo. [swishes scythe]
Jake: [screams]
BMO: Run! Just run!
[Jake and BMO bump into Finn.]
Finn: Ay-ay-ay-ay!
[They all run back into the Tree Fort, with the ghost fly follows closely. BMO stops and turns around to face it.]
BMO: Hmm. [punching] Kya! Kya!
[The ghost fly telepathically levitates BMO and throws it against the wall.]
Jake: We should ask what its unfinished business is. Ghosts always have unfinished business.
Finn: Ghost fly, what's your problem?!
[The ghost fly swipes its scythe at him.]
Finn: Come on, dude. Tell us your unfinished business!
[The ghost fly swipes two more times.]
Finn: Aah! It's no good. He's a tortured little spirit. We need help to communicate with this ghost fly.
Jake: Nah, man, let's just get someone to banish it—someone with serious paranormal juice. [dials phone]
[The scene cuts to a silhouette sitting at a table. His phone rings twice; he silences it. The silhouette, wearing a hat and carrying a bag, approaches the Tree Fort. Back inside, Finn, Jake, and BMO are hiding inside a suit of armor.]
BMO: Is he coming soon?
Jake: I think so. His ways are kind of mysterious.
Finn: That's cool.
[The ghost fly flies into the suit of armor.]
Finn, Jake & BMO: [scream]
[Finn throws off the top half of the armor and runs. Clattering and shouting are heard offscreen as the mysterious person enters the Tree Fort. Finn, Jake, and BMO are hiding behind a table barricade while the fly swipes at them. On hearing the person enter, the fly turns toward him.]
Ghost Fly: Woo?
Peppermint Butler: Let's get this ritual rolling. I got stuff to do.
Ghost Fly: Woo! [swipes at Peppermint Butler]
Peppermint Butler: Hey! No! Unclean demon, feel the sting of holy water! [throws water at the ghost fly]
[The ghost fly dodges it and flies into a hole in the wall.]
Jake: [quietly] Thank you.
Peppermint Butler: [drawing chalk circles around Finn, Jake, and BMO] These circles will protect you from the ghost's attacks while I prepare the banishing ritual. Worry not, fellow believers, for in this bag, I possess all the darkest and most powerful tools of magic ever to be assembled in one place. We're perfectly safe—as long as... [the ghost fly picks up the bag] we... have...
[The ghost fly takes the bag into the hole in the wall. Peppermint Butler puts his hat on, jumps out the window, and runs away. The ghost fly comes out and flies toward Jake but is stopped by the circle.]
Jake: Well, huh. How about that? No biggie. We'll just hang out inside these magic circles until morning. That's when ghosts go to sleep. Yep. Just got to make it... till morning.
[The ghost fly buzzes in circles around them while wailing spookily. A time lapse shows storm clouding rolling past the Tree Fort. Eventually, the ghost fly stops.]
Ghost Fly: Woo! [flies offscreen]
[Finn hears the sound of papers rustling.]
Finn: Hmm?
[On the table, the magazine he was reading flips to the page he was on and turns toward him.]
Finn: [gasps] The end of my story. And it's so close.
Jake: Don't do it, bro. It's a trap.
Finn: I know. It's an obvi trap. But wait. What if... watch this. Ha! [grabs chalk and draws a bigger circle] Mm?
Jake: Dude, what are you—?
Finn: If I extend the circle... [erases old circle] farther... I can get closer to the magazine.
BMO: Theoretically, that is possible.
Jake: Yeah, but I'm still getting a "woo-jah" feeling. This seems like a bad idea.
Finn: Just have to stay inside this circle.
[From an aerial view, the "circle" is evidently an outline of a woman.]
Finn: Ha ha! How'd you do it, Rusty? How'd you shake them otters? [picks up magazine] [laughs] Man, what a great ending! [laughs again, but suddenly starts gagging]
Jake: Finn? What's wrong, buddy?
Finn: [breathing strangely] [turns around, revealing he has transformed into a fly]
Jake & BMO: [scream]
Jake: Oh, Finn, you're disgusting!
[Finn crouches and grunts as he sprouts two wings. He flies up to the ceiling and spits on the floor near Jake and BMO.]
Jake: Aw, that's it! I've had it with this ghost fly! I wish I were a ghost so I could punch him with my ghost fist!
BMO: Jake, I have a radical option. I've been studying a karate move that could temporarily stop your heart long enough for you to fight the ghost on his own plane of existence.
Jake: What?
BMO: It's okay! I learned it out of a magazine.
Jake: [looks at Finn crawling on the ceiling] Finn... [to BMO] All right. But first you got to give me some unfinished business so I can come back as a ghost.
BMO: Tell me a joke.
Jake: Okay. What do you call a bear that only attacks guys named Paul?
BMO: Kya! [punches Jake]
Jake: [choking] [becomes pale and falls backwards]
BMO: I killed Jake! Yay, BMO!
Ghost Jake: Whoa! BMO, you killed me. Whoa. Wow. Wow! [disappears]
BMO: Jake! I can't hear you! I will start your heart up in five minutes, okay? [holds up fingers] This many!
Jake: Okay. Five minutes. Whoa.
[Several spirits of insects, animals, and furniture are seen.]
Jake: Is this some kind of low-level dead world? That's a bummer.
[Finn's body suddenly drops onto Jake's.]
Jake: Aah!
[The ghost fly flies toward him and gashes his arm.]
Jake: Aah! Oh, stuff! Aah!
[The ghost fly starts chasing Ghost Jake.]
Jake: Ohh! Ohh! Get away! [throws a ghost cat at the ghost fly]
[The ghost fly cuts it in half, causing it to disappear.]
Jake: Aah! You killed it! Aah!
[The ghost fly cuts a ghost table in half and continues chasing Jake.]
Jake: Aah! Aah! Get away!
[Jake continues throwing ghosts at the ghost fly, who slices each in half with his scythe. The ghost fly then catches up with Jake and slices his lower back.]
Jake: [screams]
[Floating into the kitchen, Jake trips over a cat and bumps the stove, knocking the pot of soup onto the floor. The ghost fly charges toward Jake.]
Jake: [screams]
[Just then, the ghost of the soup appears beside Jake.]
Ghost Soup: Oooooo...
Ghost Fly: [stops] Hmm?
Ghost Soup: Hoooooo!
[The ghost fly starts slurping the ghost soup.]
Jake: That's right. You never finished the soup. That's your unfinished business!
Ghost Fly: [nodding] Woo-woo.
Jake: And now that you've finished it, you get to ascend to a glorious, new peaceful realm.
[The ghost fly nods and starts shining and ascending slowly.]
Jake: [in awe] Ahhh. Bam! [slaps the fly to the floor, making it disappear in a cloud of smoke] Shouldn't have tried to kill me, son! [blows at smoke] Yes! [starts ascending and glowing] What's happening? Oh, BMO must be bringing me back! Yes! Yeah, BMO!
[Jake wakes up in a hospital bed.]
Jake: Mm. BMO?
[Finn and BMO run to Jake and embrace him.]
Finn: Jake, I missed you, bro!
BMO: Jake!
Finn: Don't ever leave me again!
Jake: Good job, BMO! You brought me back.
BMO: [weakly] Yes. Yay, BMO. BMO is so good.
[Doctor Princess and Nurse Pound Cake are standing by with a defibrillator, having just used it on Jake.]
Doctor Princess: Whew!

Episode ends