Candy Cane Guy
The Lich (possessing the snail)
Candy Cane Guy
The Lich (possessing the snail)
This transcript is complete.
- Jake: You gonna do the thing again?!
- Finn: Yeah, man!
- [With that, Jake turns into a ripcord and Finn tugs him; Jake uses his powers to turn into the canopy of a parachute. They both fall gently towards the surface, and Jake throws Finn when they are low enough to do so safely. Finn lands on the ground rolling and does some acrobatics eventually landing in front of Princess Bubblegum; he snaps twice, wiggles his fingers, and claps once.]
- Finn: Whaaaat?
- Jake: Nice.
- Finn: Hey, Princess Bubblegum. Hey, everybody.
- [Crowd of Candy People cheers, and everyone starts partying. A bear notices the party. Finn and Jake sit down to rest from dancing.]
- Jake: [Panting] Man... [Panting] Dancin' is rough!
- Finn: Yeah... I'm havin' some sweat issues here! I'll go get us some snackety-juice.
- [The bear arrives at Finn's and Jake's table]
- Jake: Hey, man. I'm Jake. [The bear doesn't respond.] I'm Jake. [No response] Hmmmm...
- Finn: Check it out, Jake! I got us some peanuts. And punch! [Throws a punch while saying "punch"]
- [The bear attempts to imitate Finn; Finn laughs. Finn eats a peanut, and the bear responds by eating three peanuts, but it starts choking.]
- Finn: [Spits out his peanuts] Choking!! Don't give up on me, man!
- [Everyone gasps. Finn quickly takes out the Enchiridion and slaps it on the bear's back, making him regurgitate the peanuts. Everyone cheers.]
- Candy Person #24: Whoa, Finn, nice book.
- Finn: [Casually] Yeah. 'S pretty cool. It's the Enchiridion—the hero's handbook. [To the bear] Hey, guy, you alright? [The bear softly growls.] Haha. He's all good! Everybody get back to your dancin'!
- [The Candy People cheer and resume dancing.]
- [The scene changes to nighttime; Finn and Jake are walking home]
- Jake: Uh, Finn? I think that bear is followin' us home.
- Finn: Whoa. Haha. I think you're right. Hey, bear, you gonna come hang out with us? [The bear comes nearer.] Whaddaya say, bear? [The bear eats a leaf on his fur.] Heh-heh. Awesome.
- Jake: I dunno, Finn. This guy seems kinda weird.
- Finn: Yeah. He's totally weird. Hahaha! [The bear attempts to imitate Finn's laughter.]
- Jake: [Unsure] Mmmmm...
- [Scene changes to inside of the Tree Fort. Jake is listening to music.]
- Finn: Jake! Hey, Jake! [Jake takes off one side of his headphones] Jake!
- Jake: What?
- Finn: Come here! Ya gotta check this out!
- Jake: Eh, okay.
- Finn: Check this out, man. This bear is tops blooby! [Jake rolls his eyes and sighs] Watch this. [Finn inhales and the bear does the same; Finn says, "Choo!" and the bear does the same.] Ya gotta try this, Jake. He does everything I do!
- [Finn grabs a drink and sucks on the straw. The bear looks for something to imitate with and chews on BMO's leg in resolution.]
- BMO: [Laughs] Oh, stop! [Finn pulls BMO away.]
- Finn: Haha, come on, Jake, try it!
- BMO: It's awesome!
- Jake: Heh-heh. Um... Yeah, okay. [Grabs a broom and starts sweeping] Sweepy-sweepy-sweepy. Sweep sweep sweep. Sweepin'!
- [The bear hits Jake and knocks him to the ground.]
- Finn: [Laughing] He's got me down pat! Heh-hah! Sweeping's weak.
- Jake: [Annoyed] Mmmmmm...
- Bear: Sweeping weak.
- Finn: Whoa! This guy's alright!
- Jake: This guy just busted me up my chops, Finn!
- Finn: Hey, come on, he's just a bear. He don't know nothin'.
- Jake: Mmmm... Yeah, I guess. Well, anyway, it's gettin' pretty late. Probably time for everyone to go back home to their own houses.
- Finn: Yeah, I guess you're right, Jake. It is pretty late. He should probably stay here tonight. [Jake scowls.] [To bear] You can sleep in the bathtub!
- Bear: Braaaathtub.
- Finn: [Laughs] Brathtub, hahaha! This guy's tops blooby!
- [Scene switches to the bedroom; Jake and Finn are asleep. Jake's woken up by sounds coming from downstairs and goes to investigate. He finds the bear dressed up in Finn's clothes and snapping like Finn did earlier.]
- Bear: [Claps once] Whaaaat? Hey, Princess Bubblegum. Hey, everybody. [Snaps some more and claps once] Whaaaat? Hey! [Snapping] Hey, Princess Bubblegum! Hey, everybody! [Jake slowly backs away and falls down.] Whaaaat? Hey!
- [Jake goes back upstairs to the bedroom and bites Finn's arm.]
- Finn: What are you doing?!
- Jake: Shhh. Come with me. Ya gotta see somethin'. This bear's wiggy, Finn. It's wearing your clothes and dancin' around all crazy.
- Finn: That sounds rad, man.
- Jake: What?! No—Just—! ... Rrrr! [Pulls Finn out of bed]
- [Cut to the bear sleeping downstairs]
- Jake: Aw, man! [Finn sighs.] Oh, ya gotta believe me, Finn. I swear, he was, like, all wigged-out, was dancin'... [Desperate noise]
- Finn: ...I do believe you.
- Jake: [Pleasantly surprised] Oh.
- Finn: It's just, y'know, who cares? Dancing, wearing clothes... He ain't hurtin' nobody. He's just doin' it up, y'know? He's just cool, and he likes my style. That ain't a crime.
- Jake: No. [Chuckles] I guess not.
- Finn: Okay. Great. I'm going back to bed. You comin', smart guy?
- Jake: Yeah, okay. [Chuckles]
- [They both go back to bed; Jake looks back at the bear for a moment.]
- [Scene shifts to the next morning. Everyone is having breakfast; Jake leers at the bear [who is still wearing Finn's clothes] and Finn. Everything Finn does, the bear does the same, more perfectly this time.]
- Jake: You're not even a little weirded out by this?
- Finn & Bear: [In near unison; Finn is ahead of the bear by a few words]: No, man. He's just doin' his instincts. He's like a parrot or chameleon or something. He's funny!
- [Jake makes an incredibly annoyed face]
- Finn: Anyway, I gotta go pick up BMO from soccer. I'll be back soon. And remember: don't eat my special Finn cakes. Finn only.
- Jake: Yeah, I get it. You don't need to tell me that every time you make Finn cakes.
- [Finn points at Jake, implying that he's watching him, and walks out. Jake scoffs. The bear goes towards the Finn cakes.]
- Jake: Hey, what are you doin'?! [The bear begins eating the cakes.] Why, you little...! Tryin' to set me up, eh? You think you're so smart, but this time, I'm ready. [Pulls out video camera, records bear, and laughs]
- [Time skip]
- [Jake hums]
- Finn: OH, MY GLOB, WHAT?!?! JAKE! YOU ATE ALL MY FINN CAKES! WHAT THE STINK!
- Jake: Uh, nope. The bear did it, and I've got proof. I taped the whole thing.
- Finn: [His face turns very red with rage] The bear ate all my cakes, and you just sat there and watched him do it?! What's wrong with you?!
- Jake: Ju— What?! No, man, he was tryin' to frame me, Finn! He's tryin' to steal your identity! Why can't you grok that?!
- Finn: [Exasperated noise] He's a bear, Jake! He's a wild animal! He doesn't know things! He just does stuff! He's cool!
- Jake: Ohh, fine, then that's just great. Then you and M.C. Cool Friend can go stink it up together at your stupid cool Finn party all by yourself, cause I'm not going!
- Finn: ...Wait. What? What party?
- Jake: What? Your party, man. Tonight? In the woods?
- Finn: [Reading flyer] "Finn'z... bezt... party?" But... I didn't make this flyer.
- Jake: Huh?! Well, who did, then?! [Finn gasps.]
- Finn & Jake [In unison]: The bear.
- Jake: ...I knew it.
- [Scene changes to the aforementioned party. The bear [dressed like Finn] is dancing with the Candy People including Princess Bubblegum]
- Jake: See, dude? He's not just jackin' your style. He's jackin' your whole you! Jackin' yo you up!
- Finn: What the what?
- Jake: He got in close and used you. Now he's feedin' nuts to your ex-girlfriend!
- Princess Bubblegum: [To bear] Sure! I'll have another... [The bear cuts her off by feeding her a peanut] [Muffled] ...peanut.
- Finn: She's not my... [Thinks for a moment] We never went steady.
- [The bear performs the Heimlich maneuver on Princess Bubblegum, and she spits peanuts out and laughs.]
- Jake: He's trying to replace you, and he's already got everyone convinced he's you! He didn't really like you. [Whispering] He used you.
- [Finn, angry, marches up to the bear]
- Bear: Tops blooby! Tops blooby. Tops— [Finn pulls the bear's mask off]
- Finn: Not cool, man. [Everyone stops dancing.] You're not me. You're just a bear acting like me. [The bear starts crying and quickly leaves.] [To everyone else] It's okay, everyone. The imposter is gone.
- Princess Bubblegum: Finn... nobody really thought the bear was you.
- Finn: [Saddened] Wait... what?
- Princess Bubblegum: We just thought it was one of your jokey-joke-jokes. [Makes an angry look at Finn and he briefly does the same]
- [Jake shrinks in shame in the background. Finn and Jake both run after the bear.]
- Finn: Hey! Hey, bear!
- Jake: Wait up, guy!
- Finn: Hey. I... I didn't mean to make you feel so bad about yourself. I'm really sorry about that.
- Jake: Me, too.
- Finn: But... you're a super-rad bear, so... why not just be you?
- Bear: [Crying] I... want... be... hero... like... yooouuuu!
- Finn: [With pity] Awww...
- Jake: I guess he's got a heart of gold after all.
- Finn: Hold on, bear. I got something for ya. It's the Enchiridion, the hero's handbook. Everything you need to know about being a hero is in this book. Take it, and learn.
- Jake: [Whispering] Finn, are you nuts?! We can't give that book away! It's, like, crazy-important!
- Finn: Whatever, man. We never use it, except for, like, sitting on it when the grass is wet and stuff. [To bear] Drink your fill of knowledge. Someday, you'll be a great hero.
- Bear: Thank you, Finn. Thank... yooouuu...
- [The next scene shows the bear travelling far, far away with the book on a bike. Eventually, he reaches a rocky mountain and climbs it with the book in his paw. He arrives at a cave and roars. A voice answers.]
- Voice: Did you bring the book?
- [The bear holds up the book. The Snail, still possessed by the Lich, comes out of the shadows]
- Snail [The Lich]: Yessss... One step closer.
- [The episode ends]