This article is a transcript of the Adventure Time episode "King's Ransom" from season 7, which aired on January 15, 2016.
Transcript[]
- Ice King: All right! Where is he?!
- Finn: Ice King?!
- Ice king: Where is he?!
- Finn: Jake? He's right there.
- Jake: Man, Ice King, you better roll on.
- Ice King: Where are you hiding him?!
- Finn: Who are you talking about?
- Ice King: It's Gunter! He's gone missing!
- [Thunder]
- Ice King: You in there, Goontz?
- Finn: Ice King, we didn't take Gunter.
- Jake: Come on, man, not the food.
- Ice King: Daddy's here to save you, Goonty!
- Finn: What makes you think we took him?
- Ice King: 'Cause it's obvious You took Gunter, because Gunter is like your Jake.
- Finn: Wait, what?
- Ice King: Or maybe Gunter's like your Finn. The point is, you guys have always resented us for that fact, and that right there constitutes motive And conspiracy to harm my little road dog, Gunter!
- Finn: Hey, Jake, do you think you could, like, turn into a little Gunter and go over to him?
- Jake: That's gonna be kind of weird.
- Finn: Yeah, but it'll calm him down, so
- Jake: All right, all right, all right. Wenk, wenk.
- Ice King: Aww, look at the little guy.
- Finn: You want to try telling us what happened?
- Ice King: Okay, so, we were watching some young men's junior figure skating championships on the tube semi-finals. I went to the kitchen to fix us up something to eat. When I came back, he was gone.
- Finn: What do you think, Jake? Should we check out the ice kingdom for clues?
- Jake: Or we could get a real good night's sleep and start fresh and early in the morning. Wenk, wenk.
[ snoring ]
[ mumbles,smacks lips ]
[ sighs ]
Ice king: all right!
[ snoring continues ]where is he?!
[ screams ]ice king?! Where is he?! Jake?He's right there. Man, ice king,you better roll on. Whereare you hiding him?! Whoare you talking about? It's gunter!He's gone missing! [ thunder crashes ]
You in there, goontz? Ice king,we didn't take gunter. Come on, man,not the food. Daddy's hereto save you, goonty! What makes you thinkwe took him? 'cause it's obvious ‐‐you took gunter, Because gunter is likeyour jake. Wait, what? Or maybe gunter's likeyour finn. The point is, you guys havealways resented us For that fact, and that rightthere constitutes motive... [ whimpers ]and conspiracy to harm My little road dog,gunter! [ sobbing ] Hey, jake, do you thinkyou could, like, Turn into a little gunterand go over to him? That's gonna bekind of weird. Yeah, butit'll calm him down, so... All right, all right,all right.
Wenk, wenk. Aww, lookat the little guy. You want to try telling uswhat happened? Okay, so,we were watching Some young men's juniorfigure skating championships On the tube ‐‐semi‐finals. I went to the kitchen to fix usup something to eat. When I came back,he was gone. Hmm... What do you think, jake?Should we check out theice kingdom for clues? Or we could geta real good night's sleep And start freshand early in the morning.
Wenk, wenk.
All: gunter! ‐hey, gunter!‐gunter?! See?He's gone. You're sureyou've checked everywhere? He's notbehind the fridge. He's not hangingwith his boys. ‐wenk, wenk.‐wenk, wenk. He's not anywhere nearthat ransom note. Did you just say"Ransom note"?! Yeah, what?You guys act like You ain't never heardof no ransom note before.
"If you ever wantto see gunter again, Go to moose bone clearingin the forgotten forest. Come alone.Don't bring any cops." Oh, no, we better go dowhat he says! [ echoing ] I'm comingfor you, gunter!
You know, this could all just besome kind of a goof. He seems for real. Both:yo, ice king, wait up! Hey, man,we're coming with you. But they said no cops. We're not cops. Yeah, we are! And this cop is your best chanceat finding gunter! There'smoose bone clearing! I wonder if it's calledthat because it's shapedlike a moose bone.
Okay, we'reright behind you.
Voice: [ echoing ] put the crownon the ground and leave. Cops ‐‐ what cops? Man: I‐I didn't mentionany cops. Oh, wait, I mean ‐‐first, show me gunter. Man: no. Okay.
Poor gunter.I hope he's okay. This is the dayi found him. And this ishis first birthday. His 15th birthday. His 115th birthday. The last time I saw gunter, I was yelling at himfor pooting. But it wasn't gunterwho pooted. It was me![ sobbing ] Hey, man,you can't blame yourself. Everybody poots. [ rustling ]
Get him!
Finn: hey!
Foxes? Uh, hand it over!
Wh‐a‐a‐a‐a‐a‐a‐a‐at?! Jake!Whoa, dude! You take those eight,and I'll take that one.
Okay, jakesies ‐‐fox hunt. ‐aah!‐aah! [ laughs ]
Gotcha! It's a tinfoil fake!
[ grunts ]whoa!
Not the pillow ‐‐aw, man! For some kind of job.
All I know issomebody was rounding up foxes For some kind of job. But I wantedno part of it ‐‐ honest.
Give me a name! Look, I never sawa face, okay? All I saw was a tin canon a string ‐‐ Just your run‐of‐the‐mill, Garden‐variety tin canon a string!
[ crown beeps, warbles ] [ energy humming ] Wenk!
Ugh!Ha‐ha!
Foiled again, huh?Get it? [ chuckles ]"Foiled"? How long you gonna staylike that? I don't know.It's pretty nice back support. Hey, guys!I just got valuable intel! ‐aah!‐aah! What happenedto your face, man?! What?Oh, you mean this? That's just somethingthat happens When I'm, like, miles and milesaway from the crown. You actually lookkind of good like that. Nice, full beard,little button nose ‐‐ You look tight! Thanks, dudes. So I found outthat our perp has been using Some kind of tin canto communicate. Tin can ‐‐ oh, hey, I thinki saw one over there.
Hah!I found it! Gunter?!I love you, gunter! Daddy's comingfor you! Hello?Agh! Wait ‐‐maybe if we follow the string, It'll lead usto the kidnappers. Oh, yeah.Good call!
Hurry!Get in!Shotty!
[ energy humming ] [ click!Humming stops ]
[ energy warbles ]
I hope they've beenfeeding him right. If he doesn't like his food, He'll just spit itright back at you. [ chuckles ]finn still does that. Man, the only reasoni spit those meatballs up is Because they were,like, hecka‐old. Oh, yeah, my bad. Ooh! Oh, gunter! [ blows nose ] Aw, he's starting to get grosson my cushions. That's nasty. Hmm...Oh, wait a minute! [ screech! ]‐aah! Yoink!
[ snap! ]whoa!
Sorry. You're sorry?!That's all you've got to say?! I was only tryingto help. [ grunting, growling ] Ice king, hold up!
[ zip! Sloop! Zip!Sloop! Zip! ] ‐you see that?‐you mean his shnoz? I think it does that whenit's pointing at the crown ‐‐ Like a big oldnose compass.
Hot. Hot.[ sloop! ] Hot![ slump! ] Cold.[ sloop! ] Hot. Hotter!
Scorchin'! Finn: look! The rest of the string leadsinto that cave! Ice king: lava! I can't cross that.I'll get hot feet! I'll stretch us across.It'll be a cakewalk. No!
I have to save him.What? Being rescued isan important bonding experience. It has to be me. [ wind whistles ] Finn! Listen, simon,as a fellow animal lover, I respect your passion. We'll hang back. But what about gunter? He'll give upin a hot second. Then, we jump inand help.Oh.
Finn,you're so smart. Okay, gunter,here I come! Lava‐freeze!
Both: aah! [ sizzle! ] Ow! Ow! Ow, ow, ow ow,ow, ow, ow!
Both: ice king, no!Ice king, no!
[ panting ] ‐nice!‐yes! [ panting ]
Voice:that's far enough. [ sobbing ] You got my crown... But you didn't give memy gunter. Now I've got hot feet,but no gunter! I would give a million,billion, gazillion crowns And every hot feetin the world For just one gunter! [ sobbing ]
You! You're buh‐buh‐buh ‐‐ Beautiful!
Wenk, wenk. Gunter!Isn't she beautiful? Uh, look, if you want him,you can have him ‐‐ For a hug!
All right,close your eyes. Oh, boy. [ can clatters ] [ warble! Pop! ] Wenk, wenk.
Hey, look,she left me a prezzie. [ energy warbles, crackles ]
Huh, feelskind of different. Okay,let's go home, goontz.
That'spretty cool.[ sniffles ]