The Helmet of Thorogon was an idea for an episode of Adventure Time that was about to go into production, but for some reason it was cancelled.
This episode never went into production, but they came to do several works of art on stage, the plot and characters.
Finn and Jake stumble across a field of delicious smelling flower creatures. However, a Giant tells them that only beings with large noses can smell the flowers. Jake grows his nose in size, but Finn is unhappy since his is still tiny. The Giant tells Finn that a half-bird, half-man named Thorogon has a helmet that can help, so Finn searches for his temple.
Finn and Jake roam the Land of Ooo, in search of adventure, when they stumble across a field full of weird-looking flower creatures growing out of the ground. Finn asks Jake what they are, and a booming voice answers: "THOSE ARE QUIBBLE FLOWERS!" Finn and Jake look up to see the biggest GIANT they've ever seen in their whole entire lives; He plucks the flower creatures from the ground and sniffs them.
The friendly giant explains the quibble flower blooms but one day every hundred years and has the most magnificent aroma of any flower. Finn and Jake try to smell a flower, but it screeches and thrashes at them with its spiky stem. Finally, they pin the flower down. Finn and Jake take a deep breath and…don't smell anything.
The giant blames their tiny noses, and Jake uses his stretching powers to grow his nose as big as the giant's nose. Jake takes another sniff of the quibble flower and this time he can smell it! Jake and the giant go on and on about how awesome they smell: "Oh yeah. Man, that's good. Mmmm. Uh huh. Do you smell that? You bet I do. Mmmm mmmmmm, best stuff I've ever smelled. This is what noses were made for…"
Finn is surprised that he's so upset about his lack of smelling ability. Jake assures his buddy it's no big deal if Finn can't smell a dumb flower. Finn knows it's a tiny insignificant thing, but it's this very fact that is driving him crazy. After all, he's Finn! He's fought ogres and giant and giant ogres and ogre giants and he is not to be undone by this delicate flowery foe!
Finn tries attacking the flower creatures and forcing them to give off their aroma, but it's no use. Finn is upset that for the first time his adventure skills can't help him. Finally, the giant says there is one adventure-type way Finn can smell the quibble flower. FINN:"Now you're talking. What is it?" The giant gratuitously booms: "THE HELMET OF THOROGON!"
An image of a helmet with a magical nosepiece appears in the sky, and Jake and Finn are confused. FINN: "Is that the helmet?" GIANT: "No. (beat) I mean, yes. It looks like that. But it's not the real thing. It's my mind picture of it." JAKE: "Oh."
GIANT: "Yeah, the actual Helmet of Thorogon is in the Temple of Thorogon, which is a ten day's journey… THAT WAY!" The giant points his arm across the landscape – tearing through trees and mountains – toward a temple far off in the distance.
Jake gives his buddy his condolences. If the quibble flowers bloom for one day and the temple is a TEN days journey there's no way Finn will smell them. Finn is not about to give up, though. He asks the giant to point to Thorogon's temple again. The giant obliges, and Finn leaps onto his pointing finger, as Jake follows. They whoop and holler with joy as they go on a wild ride across the whole entire world. Finally, the giant finishes pointing and they arrive at… The Temple of Thorogon!
Finn and Jake enter a long hallway, at the end of which is a majestic-looking half-bird, half-man wearing fancy robes. This is THOROGON. THOROGON: "Welcome to the Temple of Thorogon. Your prize is within reach, but first you must walk towards me down this hallway…" Jake checks out the hallway and turns to Finn. JAKE: "I think there's totally some booby traps down there." THOROGON: "No, no, no. There are no booby traps. Just come forward adventurers!" Finn turns to Jake. FINN: "Yeah, definitely booby traps." Thorogon calls them crazy. As soon as Finn and Jake start down the hallway, Thorogon yells: "Aha! You didn't expect my booby traps!" The crafty Thorogon pulls a bunch of levers. Blades and poisonous arrows, etc. fly at our heroes. Jake and Finn calmly do a series of impressive flips and twists as they dodge the weapons and make their way down the hallway. Eventually, they reach Thorogon.
THOROGON: "Congratulations, adventurers! You have successfully traversed my many—AH HA!" Thorogon quickly pulls another lever, and a trap door leading to a pit of SNARLING BLOODTHIRSTERS (half-vampire, half-zombies, half-werewolves), opens underneath Finn and Jake. Our heroes are too fast for Thorogon, though. They stop themselves from falling into the pit.
THOROGON: "Okay, congratulations for real this time. You can now wield the Helmet of Thorogon… but first you must first answer me this riddle--" JAKE: "Hold on. You can't have booby traps AND a riddle." THOROGON: "No. You can have both." FINN:"But usually it's one or the other." THOROGON: "No. It's not. It's always both. Look, do you want this helmet or not?!" Jake and Finn admit they still want the helmet. Thorogon grabs a nearby torch and holds it up to his face for dramatic effect. THOROGON: "What takes the wind from my sails, but also blows the lion's tail?"
Jake and Finn try to decode the riddle. They get frustrated that Thorogon won't tell them if they're hot or cold or even answer yes or no questions. Finally, Jake gives up and collapses on the ground… and farts. FINN: "That's it!" Finn tells Thorogon the answer is "a fart." THOROGON: "Congratulations, adventurers! You have guessed the correct answer, but first I must tell you… (meekly) I don't have the Helmet of Thorogon anymore." FINN & JAKE: "What?!"
A depressed Thorogon explains that a young adventurer came by a couple weeks ago. He got past all his booby traps and answered the riddle correctly, so he had to give it to him. FINN: "Then why'd you make us go through all that stuff?" Thorogon explains that his father, also named Thorogon, his father's father, also also named Thorogon, and even "my only brother's brother", also also also named Thorogon have guarded the Helmet of Thorogon for generations. It's what Thorogons do. As Thorogon explains his lineage, a family tree appears in the air (with every half-bird half-man under each branch named "Thorogon"). Jake smiles at the image and turns to Finn. FINN: "I like mind pictures. "JAKE: "Me, too, buddy."
After the helmet was taken, the current Thorogon just kept going through the motions. He's been getting away with it for a long time since most people don't pass the booby traps or get the riddle right anyway.
Jake and Finn feel bad for Thorogon until he flashes an evil smile and says, "Now that you know my secret…first YOU MUST DIE!" Thorogon attacks Finn and Jake with a sword, but our heroes easily defeat him. They pin Thorogon on the ground until he gives them info about the adventurer that took the helmet. Thorogon does so, and apologizes for being a jerk ("I've been under a lot of stress lately"). Thorogon sees new adventurers arriving at the far end of his temple. He tells Finn and Jake to scram as he announces to the newcomers: "Come forward, adventurers…"
Outside the temple, Finn checks out the address Thorogon gave them. He realizes it's really far away. Jake once again says it's really not the end of the world if Finn doesn't smell a quibble. JAKE: "I mean, yeah, those flowers are probably the best thing I've ever smelled in my life. And I've smelled a lot of stuff. I mean, a lot of lot of stuff. You wouldn't believe all the stuff I've smelled."
Finn tells Jake that he's never given up on an adventure, and he's not going to give up on this one -- no matter how small it may be. Jake says he can get behind that. But how can they get to the rival adventurer's house in time? Finn points to the giant's finger, which is still extended from his body. They hop onto the finger, and Finn pulls back the large fingernail. They hear a far off, "OW!" A moment later, Jake and Finn are on another wild ride across the whole entire world!
Finally, they stop in front of the giant's face. GIANT: "Hey, why'd you pull my fingernail like that?" FINN: "I was just wondering if you could tell me how to get here. "Finn holds the address up to the giant. GIANT: "Sure. It's THAT WAY!" With that, the giant points in the opposite direction, transporting Jake and Finn across the whole entire world again, until they reach—
A small, modest house. Finn and Jake hop off the giant's finger and go inside the house to find it covered, wall to ceiling, with bookcases, all of which are filled with leather bound journals. In the center of the room is a BABY. He sits at a desk, with one such leather bound journal in front of him.
Finn and Jake ask if he is the one that holds the Helmet of Thorogon. The baby removes the pacifier from his mouth and replies in a high-pitched baby voice: "I am." Finn and Jake can't help but ask how he passed all of Thorogon's booby traps. The baby admits it took him a long time. FLASHBACK TO:
The baby slowly crawls down Thorogon's hallway. Thorogon pulls lever after lever, but, miraculously, the whizzing arrows and blades fly OVER the baby's body each time he scooches down, and UNDER his body each time he scooches up.
Thorogon screams with frustration, and pulls more levers that release falling boulders and trap doors, but the baby moves so slowly, it throws of Thorogon's timing, and they all fail. FLASH BACK TO:
The baby explains to Finn and Jake that he doesn't actually care about the helmet. He's a riddle master. For three thousand years, he's been going on these quests to collect the riddles. Each time, they give him a prize – like the helmet – but he just puts it in his back room. FINN: "If you don't care about the helmet, can we have it, then?" The baby agrees to give them one of his treasures if they help him get one remaining riddle. BABY: "It resides with a CLOCK BEAR nestled high in the mountains…" As the baby explains where the clock bear lives, an image of mountains appears in the air. JAKE: "Mountains made of ice cream…" Suddenly, the mountains turn to ice cream. The baby yells at Jake for messing with his mind picture, and the ice cream disappears. Finn assures the baby they can find the clock bear. SMASH CUT TO:
Finn and Jake are bashing a clock bear (a bear with a clock in it) over the head, twisting its clock arms, and making his alarm go on and off. FINN: "Give us your riddle!" CLOCK BEAR: "Hey, hey! Calm down! I was going to tell you anyway. It's my job. Okay, here goes:'What time is it, when a creature…' FADE TO:
Jake and Finn finish telling the riddle to the baby. JAKE: "…walks on his tail in the morning, walks on his eyeballs in the afternoon…" FINN: "But walks on his two front teeth at night. "The baby giggles adorably. BABY: "I know the answer to that!" He writes the riddle and answer into the last line of his leather bound book as Finn and Jake peek over his shoulder. JAKE: "Oh yeah. I thought it was that."
The baby places the book into the last empty slot on the last remaining bookcase and the whole house starts to shake. BABY: "Finally! The curse is broken!" Finn and Jake ask what he's talking about. The baby explains he was cursed to walk the earth, or, um crawl the earth, until he collected every riddle that ever existed. BABY: "But now I can die! And the riddles will die with me! And you will die, too!" With that, the baby SCREAMS WITH PAIN as he rapidly ages into a boy, then a teenager, and then a man.
FINN: "No, no, wait! We don't want to die!" The baby, now middle-aged, stops aging for a second, and says: "Oh? Oh, sorry. I've been looking forward to dying for so long, I forget that other people aren't into it." Finn and Jake say they can see where the baby-man is coming from. BABY-MAN: "If you don't want to die though, you better grab your one treasure and get out of here." He points them toward his back room. Then the baby-man goes back to screaming as he gets older and older. Finally, his face rots away, and his body turns to dust… but it's okay, because he then becomes a SUPER CUTE GHOST and flies away: "Wheeeeeee!"
Jake looks at the collapsing house. JAKE: "This is crazy, man. We're gonna kill ourselves over a dumb flower?" Finn refuses to quit, though. Not when they're so close. They run inside the baby's back room to find… it's filled with magical objects and treasure! Jake points to the Helmet of Thorogon (which matches the picture the giant painted with his mind) hanging on a far wall. The house continues to collapse around them as Jake uses his stretching powers to lift up Finn. Finn reaches with all his might, and is about to grab the helmet, when…
He sees a way cooler GLOWING TWO-HANDED MAGICAL SWORD hanging beside the helmet. That sword is amazing! Finn looks at the helmet, and then looks at the sword. Helmet. Sword. Helmet-sword-helmet-swordhelmetsword. Finally, Finn grabs the sword. He and Jake dive out a window as the HOUSE EXPLODES behind them. CUT TO:
Close on Finn talking to Jake. Jake, in a playful way, asks Finn what gives? After all that work, why did he just give up the helmet like that? JAKE: "And don't give me that 'it's about the journey' junk either." Finn explains that once he saw the helmet, he realized he didn't want it so he could smell the quibble flowers. He wanted the helmet to smell the quibble flowers so he and Jake could enjoy something together. They are a team, and no matter how small the adventure – even if it's smelling a dumb flower – they should do it together. But when Finn then saw the sword, he realized that was something way cooler they can do together. WIDEN TO REVEAL they are--
Riding on top of the giant's finger as it moves across the world. Finn and Jake each take hold of the glowing sword. They shoot fireballs out of the sword, exploding mountains and trees. Jake agrees that Finn made the right call. JAKE: "Although maybe we should get cursed like that baby guy so when the quibble blooms in another hundred years, we can both smell it. Because, I don't know if I mentioned it, but those flowers smelled so good. Like, I mean, really good. Like, really, really, really, really…"
- The idea of a giant pointing to a distant place, and using the finger as transportation, was reused in "Five More Short Graybles" when Marceline is searching for Wizard Bill's shop.
- The scenario in the library was later used for "The Real You."