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Crappy Fanfic Saga Adventures UNITE OR WHATEVER - Episode 1

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Our series starts with Me-Mow and Donny the Grass Ogre in some place or wutevz with da Lich.


LICH: Go out into the real world... find this user called "ElectricMayhem", and PUNISH HIM for his stupid blog posts and attempts at being funny!


ME-MOW: But we are not prepared, sensei master.


LICH: Then I shall GIVE YOU POWERS!


DONNY: How many powers?


LICH: OVER 9000!


ME-MOW: What, 9000? There's no way that can be r---


LICH: SHUT YO MOUTH! [grants Donny and Me-Mow powers]


DONNY: Wow! I feel stronger! AND EVILER!!!! RAAAAW! How 'bout you, Me-Mow? .... Uh, Me-Mow....


ME-MOW: HISSSSSSSS!


LICH: Oh, yeah. I turned Me-Mow into a total insane troll/hater.


DONNY: Why?


LICH: 'CUZ I'VE GOT DA POWA! YEAH! UH-HUH!


DONNY: Well.... okay.


ME-MOW: RAAAAAAWR!


DONNY: Well, we'll go capture that EM guy for ya.


[in the real world]


We see EM walk into a pet store.


EM: Got any grapes?


EMPLOYEE: No, I don't find that duck song funny.


EM: FINE!


EMPLOYEE: Want this orange dog, it's for sale?


JAKE: Hey, you can't sell me! I belong to Finn. FINN THE HUMAN!


EMPLOYEE: Haha! It speaks little doggy gibberish!


EM: Awesome, I'll take it!


JAKE: Wut? You're sellin' me to HIM? HIIIIIM?!!?!?111


EMPLOYEE: I cannot understand doggy gibberish.


JAKE: URGH! You son of a---


EMPLOYEE: You cannot swear on this wiki... for some reason.


JAKE: THAT you understand?


EM: Heh, such cute doggy gibberish... let's roll!


The next day, EM brings Jake to the dog park.


JAKE: Urgh! I should be mathematically slamacowin' shmow-to-da-zowin' with my totes blooby bud, FINN! Wait... what?


Suddenly, EM noticed his crush, Penny, walking by.


EM: Uh, hey, Penny!


PENNY: Oh... um... hi... [runs off]


EM: Geez. SUM PEEPLEZ KAN BEE SO ROOD!


JAKE: Why is she named after a coin?


EM: You stay here and make doggy friends. I gotta hit the can.


In the bathroom....


EM: There you are! Time to HIT you! [punches tin can repeatedly] HA! I love hitting the can. OOOOOH, PUNS ARE SUCH A WONDERFUL THING.... or, is that technically things?


Just then, EM was mugged by a grass ogre dude.


EM: HOLY CRAP! WHO ARE YOU!


DONNY: Are you ElectricMayhem?


EM: Uh... what?


DONNY: IS YOUR WIKIA USER NAME ELECTRICMAYHEM?


EM: Aaaah!


DONNY: IS IT!


EM: Holycrapholycrapholycrap!


Just then, Penny entered the bathroom and saw the two.


PENNY: Dude, this is the girls' bathr--- WHAT IS THAT?


EM: Some guy, I guess! NOW HELP ME!!!


Penny ran to help EM, but was tackled by the crazed Me-Mow.


ME-MOW: Galfraxtranzlifoxdsfnhgv! HEE HEE HEEE!


PENNY: What the? [pulls out pocket knife]


ME-MOW: Mow?


PENNY: Bad kitty! [decapitates Me-Mow] BOOM! Where yo ugly head at now, Mittens?


EM: GAAAAAAK! HEEEELP!


PENNY: Oh, yeah!


DONNY: Die, ElectricMayhem! THE LICH DEMANDS IT! [is attacked by Jake]


EM: What is HAPPENING today?


JAKE: Just shut up and RUN FOR IT!


PENNY: Sounds good. LET'S-A GO!


EM and Penny escape the girls' bathroom as it suddenly bursts into flames for no reason.


EM: Who--- how---- WHAAAAAT?


JAKE: It's okay! I'm okay! Donny and Me-Mow are still dead! Let's go before they turn into zombies or wutevz! [runs off with EM and Penny]


TO BE CONTINUED

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