(The episode starts out in Princess Bubblegum's castle) Finn: Throw it, Jake! (Jake grabs a Jelly Kinder and twirls it up to Finn with his arms)
Finn: Eyahh! (Kicks it to the ceiling where others are)
Finn: These jelly kinders aren't... alive, are they?
Princess Bubblegum: (Holding one) What? No! They can't even talk.
(The Jelly Kinder frantically lets out a sound and Princess Bubblegum hastily covers its mouth)
Princess Bubblegum: Kick it! Thanks for helping me out guys.
Jake: What are these buggers for, anyway?
Princess Bubblegum: Oh, they're decorations for my Bonnibel Bubblegum Ball. Tonight!
Finn: Sounds like it gonna be large.
Princess Bubblegum: Yes! So very large. I'd like you to be there as my special guest.
Finn: You want me to go with you to the ball?
Princess Bubblegum: Heck yes. As my pal!
Finn: Oh. Right.
Princess Bubblegum: It starts at seven, so don't be late!
(Outside storm clouds are forming quickly)
Jake: Finn, we got trouble! My tail is totally frizzin' out!
Finn: I'll check it out.
(He goes outside and coming out of the clouds is a cackling Ice King)
Finn: It's Ice King!
Ice King: The Princess shall be mine!
(Creates a giant glacier)
Finn: Back inside!
(As they go in the glacier smashes through the wall and Ice King slides down it)
Ice King: Outta my way, boy!
Finn: Ice King, why are you always predatoring on girls?
Ice King: Ha! You should talk! Keeping all the babes to yourself, totally ice-blocking my game!
(Princess Bubblegum looks disgusted)
Ice King: Not (Forms a slush beast around himself) this time!
(Slush beast surrounds Princess Bubblegum and Ice King can be seen lifting her up)
Princess Bubblegum: Gah! Slush Beast!
Finn: Jake! Morning-star mode!
(Jake becomes a mace-like object and Finn twirls him and smashes him into the slush beast, covering the room in frost and snow and Princess Bubblegum appears to come out of the mist)
Princess Bubblegum: You saved me from the Ice King!
Finn: Oh, uh, yeah I guess. Is he gone?
Prince Bubblegum: He must have fled. Finn, you're so strong. And you look so handsome in the snow. What are you doing later?
Finn: I was just going to go home, I...
Prince Bubblegum: Come with me. Let's go out.
Finn: Go... out?
Princess Bubblegum: Yeah. Let's go somewhere.
Jake: We'd love to!
Princess Bubblegum: Great! Meet me in the castle gardens in an hour!
Jake: (Dragging a stunned Finn out of the room) Yes, we'll be there!
(At the treehouse)
Jake: Oh, it's a date!
Finn: No, it's not. I'm sure when she said "go out," she meant "go out," not "go out!"
Jake: Shut up, she's into you!
Finn: Come on, you heard what she said. I'm like her gal-friend.
Jake: Well, that could change tonight.
Finn: If it's a date, why are you coming?
Jake: I'm coming to help you! Hold on, I'm bringing my viola.
Finn: (groans) Man.
Jake: It's a conversation starter. (Puts viola on his back)
Finn: Fine, I'll do this if only to prove you wrong.
(Scene switches to the Castle Gardens)
Finn: Mm... Let's just bail, I changed my mind.
Jake: No! No retreat, man.
Princess Bubblegum: Hello, Finn. And I see you brought Jake.
Finn: That's cool, right?
Princess Bubblegum: Only if it's cool that I brought... Lady Ranicorn
(Lady Rainicorn falls out of the sky onto the ground)
Jake: Hiya, gorgeous.
Lady Rainicorn: (In Korean Hey.)
(Jake's tail puffs up)
Princess Bubblegum: Accept these tokens of our esteem.
Finn: (Awkwardly) Hey you didn't have to, gal...
Princess Bubblegum: Nonsense. For you, Jake, marrow-filled treats from Why Wolves. Lady got it herself.
Jake: Bones! Yeah man! (Starts tapping the bag against his head)
Princess Bubblegum: And for you m'lord, a box of chocolates.
Finn: Oh, uh, they're...
Princess Bubblegum: There's a surprise at the center.
Finn: Huh! An emrald sword! I'm all about swords! How did you know?!
Princess Bubblegum: I pay attention to things I see you being all about.
Finn: Thanks girl. It's just...WOW.
Princess Bubblegum: Come, for the wowiness has only just begun!
(Finn is riding a giant Jake and Princess Bubblegum is riding Lady Rainicorn.)
Jake: (Whispering) Psst, Finn, tell Bubblegum that you think she's hot.
Finn: (Whispering) What?! No!
Jake: (Whispering) Girls like to hear that they're hot!
Finn: (Whispering) Will you keep your voice down?!
Princess Bubblegum: Oh, Finn!
Finn: Hey, what's up?
Princess Bubblegum: I thought we might have a little race. A playful race to Marshmallowy Mweadows.
Finn: Okay, but I'm gonna kick your butt. (Awkwardly) Not that I'm thinking of butts...
Princess Bubblegum: Excellent. (She and Lady Rainicorn take off)
Jake: After her, Finn. After your woman. (They take off)
(They race to the Mweadows)
Princess Bubblegum: (Breathless) Good race, Finn.
(Jake are Lady Rainicorn are both exhausted and breathless)
Jake: Why are y'all breathless if we're the ones running?
(Princess Bubblegum hums and jumps into a hole under the flowers)
(Jumps in after her and they both come up, Finn holding Princess Bubblegum and Princess Bubblegum holding a gold skull)
Princess Bubblegum: Sorry, I saw a gold shimmer skull in there. It reminded me of you. The way your eyes sparkle. (Princess Bubblegum's eyes sparkle and Finn's eyes sparkle as he laughs nervously)
(Finn, Jake, and Princess Bubblegum are all riding Lady Rainicorn)
Princess Bubblegum: Finn, there's something I want to tell you.
(The song Oh, Finn begins and at the end, Finn and Princess Bubblegum gets dropped off on a hill laughing)
Finn: Oh, my gosh, dude. That was, like, the stupidest thing ever.
Jake: See you back at the treehouse. (Winks to Finn, Finn blushes, as Jake and Lady Rainicorn fly away)
(It is night. Princess Bubblegum and Finn are laughing)
Finn: Jeez, I dunno, I thought about it, but I think you could wear your pants as a shirt, if you really needed to.
Princess Bubblegum: (Laughs) Okay, okay, now you ask me something.
Finn: Oh, um, is this a date?
Princess Bubblegum: (Laughs) Finn, come to the ball with me.
Finn: As your chum?
Princess Bubblegum: No, as my boyfriend.
(At the treehouse, Jake is playing a game on BMO and Finn rushes in)
Finn: It was a date! There was singing and junk!
Jake: I know! I was there for that part!
Finn: Jake, she wants me to come to the ball as her boyfriend!
Jake: Oh, my goodness! It's almost seven! You need something to wear! Oh, hold on man, I am gonna make this happen!
(Jake is fitting a white tux on Finn, ring box and all)
Finn: How am I supposed to fit my weapons in this?
Jake: It's a ball! You don't need weapons!
Finn: (Puts the emrald sword in his box) I'll take my retractable sword.
Jake: Okay! Lets go, go, go!
(Finn arrives at the ball on Jake's back, inside Marceline is flying around and she and Finn wave to each other, others like Lumpy Space Princess are there and Princess Bubblegum is talking to Cinnamon Bun and sees Finn)
Princess Bubblegum: I've been looking for you.
Finn: Well, here I am.
Princess Bubblegum: Ha ha! Hey, I wanna show you something.
Finn: Okay. (Goes with Princess Bubblegum)
Jake: Okay, man. I'll see you later!
(Princess Bubblegum and Finn go up a flight of stairs to her room)
Finn: What? Hey, is this your bedroom?
Prince Gumball: Finn. (Jumps under her blaket on her bed and changes quickly into a bikini walks towards him)
Finn: (Backing up) Heh... whoa. (A drip of water falls on Finn and he looks up to find Princess Bubblegum frozen upside-down on the roof) What?!
(The Princess Bubblegum in front of Finn laughs and that laugh becomes a man's cackle as Ice King pops out her top revealing it was him in disguise.)
Ice King: This was so much easier than I thought it would be! (Shoots ice lighting at Finn, she dodges.)
Fionna: This is really messed up, Ice King! WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM WITH ME?! (Ice King causes an ice pillar to grow under Finn's feet and head towards the ceiling.)
Ice King: You're what stands between me and my Bubblegum! (Spikes come out of the ice pillar and tear into Finn's tux. An angry Finn rips his tux free and jumps off of the pillar.)
Fionna: I can't believe I fell for this trash! You got me to show up with a tux! And a ri— (in realization) My ring box! My sword!
(Ice King throws ice shards at him and Finn dives and grabs his ring box and unsheathes it, Ice King just laughs as it recedes and locks his hands in an ice ball.)
Ice King: You like my ice sword?
(Jake comes from behind a curtain near the bottom of the staircase outside Princess Bubblegum's room and hears the sound of the struggle upstairs)
Finn: Get it off me!
(Ice King laughs and Finn rushes up and smashes the ice ball against Ice King's head, Ice King blasts him with a blizzard of snow, shooting her towards the ceiling by Princess Bubblegum and he smashes the ice around her, freeing her and her hands, Ice King yells in frustration and is brought to the ground by ice raining from the ceiling. Finn lands on the ground with Princess Bubblegum in her arms.)
Princess Bubblegum: Oh, my goodness. (Finn puts her down and Jake bursts through the door)
Jake: WHAT'S GOING ON IN HE— (Sees Princess Bubblegum with her hand on Finn and his tux in tatters and rushes towards Princess Bubblegum) AAAHH! Don't you touch him! (He jumps up and flails and bites on her face until Finn pulls her off)
Finn: Shhh... It's okay, it's okay. It was the Ice King.
(Ice King shoots a blast of ice needles at Jake)
Ice King: Paws off my princess!
(Jake lets a pained cat howl as Ice King laughs until Finn punches off his crown and kicks him in the face.)
Ice King: (Groans and snarls) My magic crown... my powers!
(Finn grabs his neck)
Finn: And this is for yanking my heart guts! (Punches Ice King to the ground where Jake, wearing the magic crown, blasts him with snow.)
Jake: Ha ha! I'm a king! (Finn knocks off the crown)
Finn: No, you might catch his crazy.
Princess Bubblegum: Wow, Finn. You're, you're just really incredible. Maybe we should meet up, for a date.
Finn: (Pushes her away) No way, man. Not interested. (Thoughtful sigh) I think the reason I got all these gal-friends and no girlfriend is because I don't really want to date any of 'em. I don't need feel like I'm waiting to be noticed. I know who I am. And I'll know what I want when and if it ever comes along. But there is one girl I would do anything to date. (In a smitten voice) The Ice Queen!
Princess Bubblegum: What?!
Jake: Me, too. Ice Queen's the real deal!
(Lady Rainicorn pops out from under the floor and says "LR" in Korean).
Finn: Ice Queen is the hottest hottie, and I can't wait— (The camera fades into Finn's mouth and fades out of Ice Queen's mouth in the her castle)
Ice Queen: "—to marry her!" said Finn. Then she turned to Princess Bubblegum and said, "I hope Ice Queen will sweep me off my feet and take me to the farthest corner of Aaa, where we will do nothing but kiss and eat a whole bunch until we get fat and die." The end. So, what do you think of the fanfiction I wrote about you gals?
(Fionna and Cake are trapped with half their bodies in a block of ice, with Cake in head first, with book manuscripts in front of them, Gunter has a book too.)
Ice Queen: (threateningly) Tell me you thought it was good!
Fionna: Uh, it's good! It's good! It's really good, girl! It was amazing!
(The episode ends.)