Grob Gob Glob Grod
Grob Gob Glob Grod
This transcript is complete.
- [The episode begins in the Time Room, where a variety of people can be seen. After that, the camera zooms into Grob Gob Glob Grod asking a Nymph on a date.]
- Grob Gob Glob Grod: Denise, we have concluded you're an interesting and conventionally hot woman. My siblings and I would like to request a date with you. Are you available for a date with: Glob on Saturday, Grod on Friday, Grob on Thursday or Gob on Sunday? Please select your dates now.
- [Denise looks unhappy; the take switches to the Cosmic Owl in the hot tub while Party God joins in]
- Party God: Ahhh-rooo! That's nice.
- [Two cloud people throw toilet paper rolls on The Lich]
- Cloud kid 1: Eat it, Lich!
- Cloud Kid 2: Eat it, Lich!
- Both: Woooh!
- [The camera focuses on Jake who is eating cheese crackers at the snack table through a red cup, making loud eating noises. He dips his cup in the cheese cracker bowl for more but it is empty]
- Jake: What?! No more crackers? Eeeee. [He runs over to Prismo] Prismo! Prismo! Hey man, Hey!
- Prismo: Heeeey.
- Jake: Bad news, you ran out of cheese crackers.
- Prismo: What! No.
- Jake: Yeah, man, what are you going to do about it? [Jake shakes his cup]
- Prismo: Jaaake. [laughs] I'm Prismo the wish master. We can have all the cheesy crackers we want.[Prismo materializes five bowls of cheese crackers onto the floor around Jake. Jake laughs and starts to eat from each of the bowls]
- Jake: Prismo, you make me happy, Prismo.
- Prismo: [shyly] Oh, stop.
- Jake: I'm always smiling when I'm around you. I just noticed that. I always am.
- Prismo: I'm always smiling when I'm around you, too.
- Jake: [giggles] This feels so good.
- Both Prismo and Jake: Peppermint Butler! Death!
- Jake: What's up.
- Peppermint Butler: Hey umm, those guys are doing selfies on The Lich.[The camera goes towards the Lich with Grob Gob Glob Grod taking a selfie on him] Is that safe?
- Grob Gob Glob Grod: Definitely going to send these to Denise.
- Prismo: Oh yeah, it's fine, he's harmless.
- Peppermint Butler: Yeah, but why isn't he killing everyone in the room right now? Controlling our minds, making us rip each others eyes out while we buttercup one another?
- Prismo: Well, The Lich's primary function is to cause mass death. And since he can't do that while he is trapped in my Time Room, [zooms in to The Lich with Grob Gob Glob Grod taking numerous selfies on him still] he's stuck in a standstill, like a machine without a purpose.
- Peppermint Butler: I am so scared right now.
- Death: Yikes.
- Jake: Aw, don't worry, he ain't gonna hurt nobody.
- [Jake stretches his body over and puts his red cup on The Lich's head]
- Jake: Ha! You got a cup on your head. Ha-ha, you dingus! [laughs] See, he's docile as a lamb.
- Peppermint Butler: [perks up] Hmm. Well, okay, then I guess I can go for a selfie, too.
- Jake: Yeah, man, make your dreams come true.
- [Death and Peppermint Butler leave in laughter]
- Jake: Oh, what time is it? [looks around] Hey, yo, Clock Face, what time is it?!
- [Clock face looks over to Jake then checks his wrist watch]
- Clock Face: It's 12:30.
- Jake: Aw, boo to that! Yo, Prismo I gotta get back before Finn realizes I'm not home. He gets worried if I stay out too long.
- Prismo: All right, later, dude.
- Jake: Laters.
- [Jake materializes to the treehouse. It is nighttime in the Land of Ooo. He walks up the stairs sneakingly. Finn is lying awake on his bed with seaweed on him. Jake tries to walk past Finn.]
- Finn: Jake, where were you?
- Jake: [nervously] I was, umm, in the, uh... All right, man, I'm gonna come clean. I've been doing a lot of partying at Prismo's lately.
- [The camera zooms in on Finn he is faced calmly, then zooms out]
- Jake: Come on, man! I don't even take Lady up there.
- [The camera zooms in on Finn, still calm]
- Finn: Dude, I found out my human dad is still alive.
- Jake: Whoa, what?
- Finn: [sits up on bed] He's at some place called the Citadel.
- Jake: Whoa. [Jake sits beside the bed with Finn] Are you gonna go see him?
- Finn: I don't know. Maybe I shouldn't. Maybe there's a good reason why he didn't raise me. Like, he was probably captured by thieves and kept a slave for years.
- Jake: Yeah, or maybe he was ambushed in the wild and hid you so you wouldn't be captured, too.
- Finn: Yeah, maybe it's better not to rock the boat.
- Jake: But... it might also be good to find out if you have any genetic risk factors or allergies or whatever. Plus, you get to see what you'll look as an old guy. Could be cool.
- Finn: Heh. I guess it would be okay to meet him, just to know what I'll look like.
- Jake: Cool. Oh! If we hurry, Prismo might be still partying.
- [Jake gets the folded note from Prismo that was in his lower back. He presses the "-P." and it materializes Jake and Finn from the tree house. Back at the Time Room, the party is over; Prismo and the Cosmic Owl Owl are sitting with a game of Card Wars]
- Cosmic Owl: Come on, just one more game.
- Prismo: I don't know, mang, I was just gonna clean up and crash out.
- [Finn and Jake materialize into the Time Room.]
- Cosmic Owl: [he jumps up and down] Oh, yeah! More players!
- [Prismo sighs]
- Cosmic Owl: You guys wanna play some Card Wars?
- Jake: [waits] No. Prismo, we need to get to the Citadel.
- Prismo: Whoa! You guys do not wanna go there. Seriously. [A remote materializes beside Prismo's hand] Check this out. [A screen appears at the side of the time room showing the Citadel and examples of cosmic crimes as Prismo talks] The Citadel is a nasty-sized prison. Only the worst of the worst end up there. Real stink faces. These guys are the pits—the armpits.
- Finn: Hey, my dad must be like the warden there.
- Jake: I know you can't grant Finn and me any more wishes. So, we brought Shelby along to wish on our behalf.
- [Shelby is on Jake's hand]
- Shelby: Hello.
- Prismo: Oh, look at that, a little guy.
- Shelby: So, I wish for ... a pony for my GF!
- Prismo: Done.
- Jake: [upset] Shelby!
- Shelby: Sorry, dudes. My girl's been hounding me for a pony for months. I'm gonna get mad points for this. [Shelby's flip phone rings and he opens it with his teeth] [On the phone] Oh, hi! So you got it? That's great! You like him? Uh huh ... you gonna name him what? Speedboat? Yeah, that's a good one. [As Shelby is on the phone he crawls into Jake's ear]
- Jake: [sadly] Dang, Shelby.
- Prismo: A wish wouldn't have worked anyway. You can only get to The Citadel committing a cosmic crime.
- Jake: So, what do we gotta do? Rob a cosmic bank? Steal a space baby?
- Cosmic Owl: [starts to pick up his game of Card Wars] Oh, uh, I just remembered I gotta go home. Gotta groom my feathers [He moves towards the door at Prismo's feet] Goodbye! Goodbye! [he flies out]
- Prismo: Listen, if you guys are serious about this, [short breath] all you gotta do is find a certain sleeping old man and bring him here.
- Jake: That's it?
- Prismo: Yep. He's on one of those floating islands out there. It kind of looks like an upside-down duck.
- Jake: That doesn't seem much of a crime.
- Prismo: Yeah, but that's all there is to it. [quietly] For now.
- Jake: What?
- Prismo: Check it out! I got gifts for you guys.
- [A regular penlight materializes in front of Finn and he takes it]
- Finn: Ha, cool it's a penlight. [He starts flashing it around saying "pizoo, ziiuo, vroom"] Jake, don't look directly me in the—Aaah!
- Jake: [He is shining a brighter, larger penlight in Finn's face] Oh, oh, sorry.
- [Jake turns his penlight to a softer setting like Finns. Both Jake and Finn make noises and point the pens at each other]
- Prismo: [clears throat]
- Jake: Come on, Finn let's go find this old guy.
- Prismo: Oh! One last thing, dudes. [softly] Whatever you do, don't wake him up. [quietly] Okay, you can go now.
- [Finn and Jake leave the Time Room. Finn jumps on the islands while Jake stretches]
- Finn: [while flashing the penlight] Pew! Pew!
- [Jake stands with Finn on the island he is on]
- Finn: You ever wonder what happened to make a place all wrecked up like this?
- Jake: Nope. Hey, upside-down duck!
- [The camera quickly pans to the island with the duck faced right side up and a little hut faced upside-down]
- Jake: No, wait, it's right side up.
- [The island quickly turns around upside-down]
- Jake: Aha!
- [Jake turns into stairs that Finn runs up onto the island. They both go to the hut]
- Jake: [He makes his hand large and knocks loudly as he talks loudly] Hey! Get out here, old man!
- Finn: [whispering] Dude, shh. Don't wake him up.
- Jake: [shrinks head only speaking softly still knocking relatively loud] Hey, get out here, old man.
- [Jake shrinks and grows in through the keyhole and let Finn in]
- Finn: Pizow! [His penlight shines on the old man who is on a bed covered in his hair except for his bald spot the man turns over in his sleep]
- Finn: Old man.
- [Jake stretches himself under the bed while saying "beep, beep, beep ..." Than the old man turns over and opens his mouth and a nightmare version of Prismo comes out of his mouth]
- Jake: [whispering] Uh oh! [The nightmare version of Prismo comes out of his mouth and scratches the wall] Finn, a little help?
- Finn: Bizzow
- [Finn shines his penlight on the nightmare version of Prismo and it breaks like glass. Another nightmare comes out of his mouth and Jake looks at his penlight]
- Jake: Gizzow
- [Jake destroys the other nightmare version of Prismo and Finn climbs onto Jake]
- Finn: Let's hoof it!
- [Jake gets out of the hut and jumps from one island to the other. The old man starts to move in his sleep]
- Finn: Jake, don't jostle the package.
- [Three nightmare versions of Prismo start to come out of the old mans mouth and start to chase than try to attack Finn making screeches]
- Finn: Yahct! [He jumps and destroys them as well with his penlight] All right! [Finn landed on the old mans stomach and thousands of nightmare versions of Prismo come out of the old mans mouth. Finn tries to destroy them with his penlight]
- Finn: There's too many of them!
- Jake: Let's see here.
- [Jake looks at his penlight and the dial says "flashlight" and "supernova" and he sets it to supernova. Soon they are covered in a black ball then a bright flash of light appears destroying all the nightmare versions of Prismo and they arrive to the Time room]
- Prismo: Oh, hey, your back.
- Jake: [normally] Dude's got serious night terrors.
- Finn: [normally] What now, Prismo?
- [Prismo looks at the old man for a couple beats]
- Prismo: Okay, wake him up.
- Both Finn and Jake: What?!
- Prismo: Yeah, [soft] I just wanted one last look at myself.
- Finn: Wait, this old man is you?
- Prismo: That's right: Prismo is nothing than dream of a wrinkly old man. Man, I've gotten a lot hairier, but also balder? Tell me how that makes any sense. I'm like a big ol' hairy raisin.
- Jake: So, wait, what happens to him when we wake him up?
- Prismo: Poof! I'm a goner. Thus ends mighty Prismo.
- Jake: [sadly] Prismo.
- Prismo: Killing a wish master is a cosmic crime. Once I'm dead, the guardian will show up and take you to The Citadel.
- Finn: I don't think seeing my dad is worth sacrificing your life
- Prismo: Ah, don't worry. As soon as my corporeal body falls back asleep again, [to himself] in a thousand years, [out loud] I'll be back.
- Jake: You sure about this?
- Prismo: Hold on, let me take one last look around.
- [The camera pans around the room showing, left to right, old man Prismo in his bed, The Lich, Finn, Jake, a puddle, and Christmas lights lingering on the ceiling than the camera zooms in on Prismo]
- Prismo: Huh, thought I'd own more stuff by now. Okay, let's do it!
- Jake: Still feels like a bad idea, man.
- Prismo: Pssh! What could go wrong?
- [The Lich looks up, smacks away Finn and Jake. Then he picks up old man Prismo.]
- The Lich: Wake up.
- [The Lich shakes old man Prismo awake]
- Prismo: Wa—Wait, I've changed my mind—[gasp]
- [Prismo is off from the walls—his dream self has died.]
- Jake: Prismo, don't worry! I'll put the old man to sleep and get you back!
- Finn: Dude! That means The Lich jacked our entry into The Citadel.
- Jake: Aw, no man, how are you gonna see your dad?!
- Old man Prismo: Hello? Who are you guys? Could any of you strangers tell me how to go home? I'm done with my nap.
- Jake: Old man Prismo.
- [The Lich stares at old man Prismo who he is still holding]
- Old man Prismo: I just woke up from my nap, but I'm ready to go back to bed. I'd like to go home and take a nap.
- Jake: No, old man Prismo, don't talk to him.
- [The Lich holds Old man Prismo over him]
- Old man Prismo: Are you my son?
- [The Lich exhales a deadly black gas into old man Prismo's nostrils. Old man Prismo gasps and, in a grotesque display of gut-wrenching horror, turns to ash, undone by the Lich's unholy death magick. Thus ends mighty Prismo indeed.]
- Jake: Old man Prismo! No! [he inhales deeply]
- [Enraged by the Lich taking Prismo's life, Jake stretches into a big buff version of himself. The Lich has done it now...]
- Jake: Lich! I'm gonna kill you!
- [He starts punching his knuckles in a berserker rage. The Lich, proud of the life he has recently taken, starts to laugh evilly and mockingly. The cosmic crime—murdering a Wishmaster—committed, a space hole materializes like a television flickering on in the Time room, beyond it a Guardian from the Citadel, which, with a closed-eyed, emotionless face, does its duty as jailer and warden as it fires off its forehead crystallizer beam to cage the Lich in a frozen crystal, cutting off his laughter. Such is the justice of the Cosmic Guard. Jake stretches back to his normal state. The Guardian grabs the crystallized Lich, bound for the Citadel to rot in crystallostasis for the rest of eternity.]
- Finn: Oh, dang! I think they're going to the Citadel! I'M COMING, DADDEEEEEEE!
- [And with that, Finn charges full speed towards the recently crystalized Lich and therefore the space hole leading to the Citadel which, in turn, leads to his father, Mr. Mertens. The moment of truth—the moment the human boy adventurer had waited for all his life—has come. It's now or never for Finn...]